Happy Halloween - only 6 more days of radiation - What Now?




Demi, Ellie, Eli and Anthony

 

Well, the intense treatments are coming to an end soon, it seems like I should be excited, but am I?  Not really, more like scared, depressed, sore, lost, exhausted, happy, nervous, stressed, emotional, relieved .... I think that I've been so busy handling the day to day medical treatments and their effects that I really haven't come to terms with the fact that I have/had cancer. 





Vincent







What next?  I still have infusions every 3 weeks for a year, and take an aromatase inhibitor to stop the estrogen in my body for 5 years, these both have side effects that need to be dealt with... and... Is the cancer really gone?  Will it recur?  How long before I feel normal again, hmmm?  I hear that now I have to find my "new normal", that my life will never be the same after this experience.  I believe it! 



Jude and Isaac



According to my doctors I've handled my treatments well, I wonder what it's like if you don't - YIKES!  After cancer treatment you are left with a exhausted, battered, bruised and burned body - cancer free, hopefully, but damaged.  My body hurts everywhere, to the point where it's hard to move, my mind can't concentrate on anything longer than 5 minutes, unloading the dishwasher is exhausting.  So how do I find that new normal?  How do you begin to heal spiritually, emotionally, physically?  I don't know, but now I'm going to find out, one day at a time, starting right now!!!







Paul, Thomas and Isaac



I started looking up information on how long this healing process can take - most sources say that you should expect it to take at least as long as you were in treatment to heal, then you will probably never feel like you did "before".  I asked one of my doctors last week what my expectations should be, she said I should consider thinking about trying to go back to work part time after the first of the year, and see how it goes.  I don't know if this makes me feel worse or better, at least it makes me feel like I'm not a whiner and a wimp (looking for the positive here)!  





 



Emily and Sarah



On the bright side - my hair and eyebrows are growing back, my family has been amazing, supportive, helpful, patient, understanding...I could go on and on; I feel somewhat better than while I was undergoing chemo, I can drive again, sometimes I can cook a whole meal by myself, food tastes right now, I've lost weight, I can walk further without getting tired, and I'm almost done with rad

George and Vegas

iation.  The support from friends and acquaintances has been overwhelming (thank you all), the cancer survivors have been shining examples of strength, information, bravery and so much more, the doctors, nurses, MA's, radiation therapists...have been wonderful. 







Paul, River, Devin and Thomas



There is so much to be thankful for, I know that with all that I've been given, and with so many people praying for me that I'll find my "new" normal, and it will be better than my "old" normal.









Thanks and God Bless you - and Happy Halloween,



Linda







Living Proof - Herceptin a monoclonal antibody for HER2/Neu+ Breast Cancer

This is a great movie about what it took to get Herceptin as a standard of treatment, not only for metastatic breast cancer, but all breast cancers that over express the HER2 protein, causing this to be an especially fast growing cancer that had a higher recurrence rate.  Read all about this great drug, which has been part of my treatment, and will be for the next several months, at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trastuzumab

I laughed and cried, sympathized and understood.  The movie was very well done and it was a great portrayal of women with breast cancer.  Check out the trailer, I was able to order the movie from Netflix - if you watch it let me know what you think.



Linda

Guest House - Radiation - Eye Surgery

 The Guest House Deck is beautiful and peaceful.  You can sit in the porch swing, eat at the tables, and as it gets dark you can see the wildlife come out - ducks, nutria, and a very large family of raccoons.  The sound of the fountain softens the sound of the traffic.  It's so peaceful and restful.  It certainly hasn't hurt that the weather has been so nice, it's been perfect for sitting out there in the evening, and just watching the world go by.  And the college kids and the fraternity guys in the building across the creek, but Katrina hasn't noticed so don't tell her.

Here's a picture of our room, it's nice and cozy, but roomy enough for the both of us.  It's really quiet and private.  I couldn't think of a nicer place to stay.  We've since moved to a different room upstairs with a couch and queen size bed, it's even nicer.





It looks like the eye surgery has been successful, my eyes have stopped watering, mostly, and I can see well enough to drive some and read for more than 5 minutes.  I see the doctor tomorrow for the follow up.  I have to say that the reaction that my eyes had to the taxotere has got to be one of the worst and most inconvenient side effects of the chemotherapy.

I started the hormone therapy - Arimidex (anastrozole), not sure how it works, but it somehow block estrogen.  The generic form of this drug has only been available for a couple of months, my pharmacist told me that a couple of months ago his cost for the drug was $475 for a 30 day supply, now that it's generic his cost dropped to $10 for a 30 day supply, hmmmmm, I wonder what that says about the pharmaceutical industry?

Radiation is progressing well.  We'll see what next week brings.

It sure is great to come home on the weekends.

Later,
Linda